Apr 23, 2004
I'm back from my Villains Int'l. Convention. It was pretty bit boring, what with everyone discussing henchmen care tips, how to get your getaway vehicle really shine, yadda yadda...
But I had to go. I don't know what pushed me, but I soon found out.
I finally met my real dad.
Tee hee... It was so funny, re-enacting the whole Star-Wars-'Luke,-I'm-your-father' thing. Only I'm not the protagonist, unlike Luke Skywalker.
It was kinda weird finally meeting my dad and all that. But him being a villain is SO totally cool. Now I know where I got the genes from.
Hm, although the convention lasted the whole week, I have absolutely nothing to "blog" about. I guess I'm so excited about meeting my dad. We have a lot of catching up to do.
Posted at 09:31 am by alarice
Apr 19, 2004
now let's have some blog fun!
Hm. I actually put off extra time in building my new doomsday device just so I can answer this. But these things are so fun, it was worth it.
Just hope that moon^child doesn't mind. :) (And by the way, dude, I'll keep you posted if I've decided to sack my sidekick.)
Using the letters M-I-N-D, reveal four things about yourself.
M - minions. I have them.
I - insane. As proclaimed by my psychiatrist. (And if you're reading this, you bitch, I hope overcharging me will earn me karma points for the next life!!!)
N - nuts. I hate them.
D - ducks. As once quoted by my mentor, "Be like the duck. Gliding smoothly along the surface, while paddling like hell underneath." Or something to that effect.
And now, for the feature presentation... (drumroll please...)
It's an "I say___, you think___" thing, according to moon^child here--my future sidekick if she gets lucky.
chill - drinks, refreshments
poodle - spaghetti
tissue - skidmarks
sharp - clever woman
foam - ooh... soft.
wee - that annoying expression used by annoying cartoons when they're in the swing.
crack - my psychiatrist.
bellybutton - Aladdin
bounce - Destiny's Child
disco - 70's
Posted at 06:53 am by alarice
Apr 18, 2004
but the superheroes will miss me...
Chase went on a vacation. Well, for those who aren't educated yet, Chase is my sidekick. He says his butt needs a rest.
I told all of these to my psychiatrist, then she told me that maybe I should go on vacation, too. What, and ruin my evil plans of controlling the universe? Yeah, right.
So I went to the grocery to buy some cat food for my cat named Cat, and I ran into J. Once again, for those who aren't educated yet (and please be aware that I absolutely look upon you as morons!) J is my nemesis. He's this "hot spy" from Russia. Yeah, whatever. So he was like, poking the livers in the meat section then my cart bumped right into his, and he was all, "Surrender, you evil uh..." Really. He ran out of adjectives to describe me. "... villain! Or I shall thwart you with my peanut butter jar." Lame-o! So I was just, "Thwart your peanut butter jar someplace else, loser. Go away, for I don't want to share my supply of oxygen with you!"
Huh. That J guy is really getting on my nerves. Just because he is so hot (and I suspect that he suspects that I have a crush on him) doesn't mean he can go around threatening to put me in jail in Pakistan lest I give up my plans of dominating the world.
But for a loser wearing only a shirt and Gap jeans, he sure does look really hot.
Posted at 10:06 pm by alarice
Apr 17, 2004
My psychiatrist thinks I need to do this.
She says that I have to stop torturing international spies and secret agents and instead, direct all that energy into something positive.
I mean, seriously. Does she think that having a blog will make my dreams of dominating the whole world dematerialize? Between the two of us, she's the psycho.
The hard truth is, nobody takes a villain seriously anymore. Especially if she's a woman. And those who do believe in us think we're evil.
I'm not evil. Having an attainable goal is not evil. I don't even smoke or drink, and I wear only faux fur. Just because I look drop-dead gorgeous doesn't mean I'm evil either. I might be vain, but seriously, who isn't? Even men have facials and foot spas nowadays. I mean, have you seen all those villain skin portrayed on TV? Ew.
Hmm, this blog thing isn't so bad.
Posted at 08:12 am by alarice
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Alarice. Supervillain.
"From the ashes of my downfall shall rise the empire of my success"
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